How open are you about your rape fantasy kink?

[Claire]

I'm curious to know how open you are with the people in your life when it comes to your interest in rape fantasy stories. Do you feel you can share that with your partner, your friends, family even?

In my case, I'm mostly keeping this to myself even though I'm now running this forum. I will probably share this with a future partner, at least after a while. Probably not a good idea to mention this on a first date. But when it comes to family and friends, I have been keeping this hobby of writing and reading noncon erotic fiction to myself.

[Blue]

Normalerweise behalte ich diese Fantasien für mich. Da ich aber auch im realen Leben immer wieder einmal im BDSM-Bereich unterwegs bin, teile ich dort meine Fantasien gelegentlich mit Frauen, die die gleichen Interessen haben. Und wir haben dann auch schon bei Treffen Vergewaltigungsszenen durchgespielt. Mal mehr, mal weniger realistisch. Aber immer irgendwie gut.

[LaLia]

I have a real girlfriend who knows a little bit, but only minimally. Otherwise, no one...well, in chat and here too. On the one hand, I also agree that you don't have to tell everyone your fantasies, but that's really independent of the type of fantasies. So, I don't tell everyone about my normal preferences either, although a rape kink like that could certainly be doubly dangerous, that's for sure.

[praetor3d]

Nope no one. Only with anonymous people I converse with online.
The irony is that sometimes I feel like I know these online people at a far deeper level than people in real life.

[Vela Nanashi]

I am not super focused on the whole rape fantasy, but sometimes my stories have rape in them... I have shared my stories with family, friends, and even in writing school, mostly fantasy/scifi with erotic stuff in it rather than faded to black, also some things very romantic, and then also dark things that are overcome by the victims who rise stronger, like a phoenix from the ashes, if mentally scarred by the situation.

[Claire]

Nope no one. Only with anonymous people I converse with online.
The irony is that sometimes I feel like I know these online people at a far deeper level than people in real life.

That is a little sad, isn't it? But I know what you feel. I wonder how many of us would be surprised to hear a "Wait, you too?!" if we talked to some people we know more openly about our kinks.


@Vela Nanashi What have the reactions been like to you sharing your stories?

[Vela Nanashi]

Some people were surprised, some people elated that I dared share that with them, and enjoyed it, maybe with some uncertainty about how to respond, since the subject is not something one societally tend to discuss openly. I kind of have tried to break some of those norms. Then again when it comes to family a lot of us do erotic art of one form or another, sculpting, carving, painting, drawing, 3d modelling, ai prompting for pictures, writing.

So given that I fit right in, and my stories I have shared have been enjoyed

Of course I get that erotica of the mostly consensual, romantic kind is easier to swallow for people, then again 50 shades of grey was a huge hit and not exactly proper bdsm (not that I have read it, but I heard that bdsm community said they were not describing proper safe practices in there, so it was kinda rapey, I don't really have an opinion myself though).

[LaLia]

Well, I notice in my circle that people are definitely taking it very lightly. Vela mentioned 50 Shades; that was a real hype, and suddenly everyone kind of knows what BDSM is and everything else...how would you put it: are we so far advanced enough to experiment so much? I have a friend who's about 12 years older, and she always says Generation Z is pretty perverted.

A good example is that the topic of bisexuality is handled very openly, and yes, we might be really surprised if we knew how many people actually share our fantasies.

But I also believe that our kink has a very special and unique appeal: it is and should remain pure fantasy. I'm much better at developing fantasies about something I don't actually know. Why do so many women have fantasies about two men or gangbangs? Because very few will ever experience that in real life.

[praetor3d]

Nope no one. Only with anonymous people I converse with online.
The irony is that sometimes I feel like I know these online people at a far deeper level than people in real life.

That is a little sad, isn't it? But I know what you feel. I wonder how many of us would be surprised to hear a "Wait, you too?!" if we talked to some people we know more openly about our kinks.

I don't look at it as sad. I guess I look at it as a fun secret.
Although "Wait, you too?!" would certainly be fun, but the risk to reward on that is far too large.

[HistBuff]

I email and share a link of everything I post here with human resources at my job.

Jokes aside, my wife knows I'm writing erotic stories online, but she balked a bit when I hinted at the non-consensual nature of most of my writings, and I never brought this up after. She's "grey" asexual and doesn't really have sexual fantasies to speak of, so I can hardly expect her to understand the notion of rape fantasy. It would be quite a challenge for me to explain her that I've been having those kinds of fantasies since puberty.

In a nuthsell, my wife knows a bit. My extra-marital partners know a great deal more.

As for my friends and family they basically know zilch.