Men at War

[Claire]

I really loved reading this story. Such a great premise and so delightfully irreverent, spitting in the face of political correctness! I started reading this story when it was on RU and happy I got the opportunity to complete it here.

I think you might have misinterpreted the intent behind the story a little, but I'm glad you got some enjoyment out of it.

[Vile8r]

I really loved reading this story. Such a great premise and so delightfully irreverent, spitting in the face of political correctness! I started reading this story when it was on RU and happy I got the opportunity to complete it here.

I think you might have misinterpreted the intent behind the story a little, but I'm glad you got some enjoyment out of it.

Re-reading some of it, I see I may have misinterpreted some of your intent, but still a very hot read.

[Vela Nanashi]

Chapter 1:

These men at war folks clearly hate Jordan Peterson. Also I think Jordan Peterson might take offense to this story, as may many who think he is partially a decent person.

This reminds me a little so far of a few stories over on RU, not fully though, and I can't recall any names right now.

pick up the slag -> pick up his slack ? I think

Silly, pathetic and despicable people and situation. I think I am slightly similar to LaLia & Shocker in that I don't like destruction/damaging of books, nor art, etc, but then I am also no fan of rape either, putting it mildly. I can detect this is humour playing off various tropes, but I think my sense of humour might be a bit different than yours, but we will see how next chapter is.

Chapter 2:

HR at our firm, yeah... that and your body being visible Jacob should be sufficient to catch you for law enforcement.

Rapists with twisted morals, a theme in two of your stories, and I actually like that. Also sorry for not managing a blow by blow commentary, I think I am not quite in the best commenting state today.

Lydia the fluffer as they call that role in porn industry, yeah lol.

It is not really doing anything for me on the arousal level, but it sure is silly, and mildly amusing, maybe I need to put on another music track than the one I am using, hmm yes let's find a comedy track rather than this slightly spoopy track...

Chapter 3:

Ok Pooka feels a bit better than Air Prelude makes me smile a bit when combined with the silly of the story.

Slightly weak dialogue for her as she wakes up, can't say why, but the rest of your dialogue is better usually, but then she is waking up from being drugged, so maybe it is intentional.

Jerome is a brave man or has a cock that is resistant to teeth.

Jacob thinking "wait I paid 25k for this?" in his post nut clarity.

I think the guys are silly, there are women who actually enjoy anal and oral too, not just vaginal. Still they are meant to be silly, and that includes leaving lots of genetic evidence in her.

Chapter 4:

Some mild chuckles at the absurdity of it all. I think you did a good job writing this story, it was not quite my cup of tea though, even if filling every hole and a nice bukkake after is things that tend to work for me, I think the comedy made things glitch in my mind as far as arousal is concerned. Still well written absurd comedy story

[Claire]

@Vela Nanashi Thanks for reading the story. I would have predicted that this is not your type of humor. I'm glad you had a least some fun with it, nevertheless.

Also I think Jordan Peterson might take offense to this story

Oh, I'm sure he would. I also imagine him condemning the entire rape fantasy genre, regardless of whether he's part in a story or not.

This reminds me a little so far of a few stories over on RU, not fully though, and I can't recall any names right now.

Hmm, now you made me curious. In case you remember, let me know!

pick up the slag -> pick up his slack ? I think

Thanks, will fix that!

I think I am slightly similar to LaLia & Shocker in that I don't like destruction/damaging of books, nor art, etc

Just to be clear, I'm not a fan of destroying books either just because I included that in a story!

Jacob should be sufficient to catch you for law enforcement.

Don't try to think too much about the logistics of this whole operation. Once you try to root that in realism, the whole story collapses.

Slightly weak dialogue for her as she wakes up, can't say why, but the rest of your dialogue is better usually, but then she is waking up from being drugged, so maybe it is intentional.

No, I think you're right. Her voice is rather flat. The guys are all dripping with personality and she's very bland. I cold have fleshed her out more as a character but it's also not important for the story who she is. But I can't deny that her dialogue lines are probably the weakest in the story.

I think the comedy made things glitch in my mind as far as arousal is concerned

Yeah, it's the same for me. Whenever I read the story, I just end up laughing too hard. But I could see this really work for someone like @skuttrusk who like to lean into not just a satirical but almost cartoonish tone. Maybe I should have made this the story where I asked people whether they came!

[Vela Nanashi]

I mean I do go insane/silly in my stories frequently, and my attachment to reality is not great since I operate in fantasy and scifi, but I don't usually combine non con with humour, or at least I don't think I do, as for me non con is meant to be something a villain does, and what I want to evoke toward the villain is usually dark emotions, such as hate. Also yeah I know you are not a fan of destroying books and art etc

So there was at least one series that takes place in the future these guys are trying to create I think, but I did not read all of them, just skimmed them on RU, when hunting forbidden content.