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It's okay, I feel a little lonely, too. - RavishU Memorial Contest

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Claire
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It's okay, I feel a little lonely, too. - RavishU Memorial Contest

Post by Claire »

Teaser: She was popular among her clients, offering more than just a bullet list of sexual services, a high-class experience. He gently pushed her auburn hair back behind her ears. Then he leaned in for a kiss. His hands wandered slowly from her hips to her butt. Neither sneaky and shy like an insecure schoolboy trying to cop a feel, nor greedy and unconstrained like a young man starving for sex. As a man with experience, he exuded a masculine confidence that had no need for the off-putting machismo so many of her clients confused with a healthy masculinity. He knew what he wanted and expressed that without feeling entitled to it. She found that quite attractive.
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The author of this story has read and accepted the rules for posting stories. They guarantee that the following story depicts none of the themes listed in the Forbidden Content section of the rules.

The following story is a work of fiction meant for entertainment purposes only. It depicts nonconsensual sexual acts between adults. It is in no way meant to be understood as an endorsement of nonconsensual sex in real life. Any similarities of the characters in the story to real people are purely coincidental.

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This story is an entry for the RavishU Memorial Contest.
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It's okay, I feel a little lonely, too.


“Richard! What a lovely surprise! I didn’t take you for one of the guys that would go for the Valentine’s Day discount, though.”

She knew the man well who had just entered through the door to her room. He was fine with being teased like this by her without taking offense.

“Good to see you, Lizzy. And I actually just came in for a drink. When I saw you were working, I couldn’t resist. But I thought you didn’t work on holidays?”

Lizzy went close to him and gave him a friendly hug. In terms of height, she was above average for a woman. But Richard was a mountain of a man. Next to him, she looked very small, no more than a twig. He hugged her back, careful, as if he had to moderate his strength so as not to break her.

“Oh please, since when is Valentine’s Day considered a real holiday? You know that I make my living feasting on the unfulfilled needs of lonely souls. What better day could there be to work for me than today?”

The smile on his face told her that he enjoyed their banter. His hands came to rest on her hips, drawing her close to his body. She could feel the warmth of his giant hands through the flimsy fabric of the revealing clothes she wore.

“You’re as witty and as gorgeous as ever, Lizzy. I’ve been here for two minutes and you’ve already reminded me why you’re my favorite.”

She was popular among her clients, offering more than just a bullet list of sexual services, a high-class experience. He gently pushed her auburn hair back behind her ears. Then he leaned in for a kiss. His hands wandered slowly from her hips to her butt. Neither sneaky and shy like an insecure schoolboy trying to cop a feel, nor greedy and unconstrained like a young man starving for sex. As a man with experience, he exuded a masculine confidence that had no need for the off-putting machismo so many of her clients confused with a healthy masculinity. He knew what he wanted and expressed that without feeling entitled to it. She found that quite attractive.

When his lips wandered from her mouth to her neck, she moaned. It felt good, but there was also an element of showmanship in her reactions. She was providing a service here after all.

“Mhm… all right, Richard. Let me take care of you. Or I’ll be the one paying you once we’re done here.”

Richard chuckled at her suggestion.

“As if. If my head was as pretty as yours, I’d never pay for a damn thing in my life again.”

Lizzy smiled, her eyes focused on his belt. She began to slowly undress him.

“Oh? You think it’s that easy?”

His pants dropped to the floor. His underwear soon followed.

“I know it’s hard work you’re doing. I certainly couldn’t do it. I’m sorry, I meant no offense.”

He had misunderstood her playful remark. She appreciated the sentiment, but she wanted him to relax, not worry. She gave him a gentle push towards the bed while winking at him.

“None taken.”

He fell down onto the bed as if the push she gave him carried with it an irresistible command. With him sitting on the edge of the bed, Lizzy got on her knees, letting a small exhausted sigh escape her lips.

“You okay, Lizzy? You seem a bit tired.”

She scolded herself in her thoughts. Yes, she was tired. She had worked a lot today. She’d see one more client after Richard and then would call it a day. But she wasn’t supposed to let her clients notice that.

“I’m fine, Richard. Don’t tell me you’re turning into one of the guys trying to save me from my horrible fate?”

She managed to make that sound confident and endearing. Richard started to unbutton the shirt he was still wearing.

“Wouldn’t dream of it.”

“Good boy.”

She took a closer look at the flaccid penis in front of her. Just resting on his balls, it looked tired too. She found it cute. She’d seen a lot of penises over the years and Richard’s was flat out unremarkable in how average it appeared if looked at in isolation. It was just that even his slightly above average penis looked small on a man that was otherwise a giant. She gave it a slight nudge with her nose while maintaining eye contact with him. She could smell that he had just taken a shower. Her hands rested on his hairy thighs, her pale hands a stark contrast to his suntanned skin. Then she took him into her mouth, slowly, gently, starting with just the tip, her soft lips exerting a delicate pressure on the squishy purple head.

Richard leaned back, closed his eyes and gave off a relieved sigh. A satisfied smile adorned Lizzy’s lips as she felt the penis grow in her mouth. She liked that he hadn’t been hard from the get go. She preferred men that knew how to savor sex over those who approached their lust with the impatience of a toddler devouring a chocolate cake. Richard was in his forties, very tall, broad shoulders, his strong body shaped more so by hard physical labor than by the precise training of every muscle in a gym. He didn’t have the physique of an athlete with clearly defined muscles, but the appearance of a bear. The ample hair on his body underlined that animalistic strength of his. Lizzy, while by no means a delicate girl but an elegant woman, could have easily played the beauty for his beast.

Her head was slowly bopping back and forth. Neither of them was in a rush. It was Richard who was unable to maintain eye contact. He closed his eyes, submitting his still growing member to the pleasure of the embrace of Lizzy’s soft lips. She smiled looking at his relaxed face. His deep voice produced sounds that were neither moans nor grunts but something in between. That was all she needed to hear to know that she was blowing him just right.

Lizzy knew that she could make him come if she wanted to and he wouldn’t complain about it. But she herself had gotten sopping wet. The frustration of not having come for months made her crave more than the satisfaction of doing her job well. She had lowered her silk panties while sucking Richard off. She knew that she was going to mount him soon and thus knew that they would just be in the way. When she felt him getting closer, she let his cock escape her mouth and gently cradled his balls for a moment before standing up. The drop of viscous liquid that dropped into the panties between her knees as she stood up betrayed her studied posture of professional elegance and revealed her eagerness. The body doesn’t lie, or so she had heard. And yet, her body did nothing but lie to her.

She could hear Richard gulp as she stepped out of her panties. She moved towards him, sat down on his lap and pressed her labia against the hardness between his legs, exchanging one pair of soft lips for another. She ground herself against his cock, coating the already slick rod with her overflowing wetness. She looked him in the eye, the earlier playfulness all but gone. She meant business and Richard noticed it immediately.

“You…”

He swallowed the excess saliva in his mouth.

“… seem eager.”

In response, she hugged him tightly, squishing her breasts against his broad chest. One arm was wrapped tightly around his back, the other was busy positioning his cock at the entrance to her pussy. She rubbed her cheek against his, then murmured into his ear:

“For the right man…”

It wasn’t a lie, but it was also far from being the whole truth. In some sense, she was using him as much as he was using her. She hesitated a moment to lower herself onto him. Was she really going to go down that path again? She knew what awaited her at the end of it. More frustration. She couldn’t orgasm anymore. For five year she hadn’t been able to come. Unless… unless she allowed herself to remember it.

She let herself sink onto his cock. Very slowly did she let the fully erect penis slide into her body. A long drawn out moan escaped from her mouth directly into his ear as her hardened nipples scraped over his muscular chest. Her movement came to an end once his entire length was buried inside of her. The bear underneath her was holding her tight, his cock violently twitching inside of her desiring the return of the agonizingly pleasurable slow friction that had just come to an end. It felt so good.

But she couldn’t fully enjoy it. She had experienced it countless times: the signals of her body telling her that she was ready, the pleasure of a man’s lust expanding inside of her, stretching her, reaching for her depths, engulfing her. But the desired release wouldn’t come. Her body granted her that mercy only if she allowed her mind to relive that first rape, that breaking in ritual she had been subjected to before her career in forced prostitution began.

She started riding him, plunging her hips into his over and over again. She pushed his upper body onto the bed. Her delicate arms had felled the mountain. This time, she would not be denied, not by her own body. She impaled herself on his manhood, encouraging it to grow ever harder, wider, longer, to reach deeper. It had to be somewhere in her, that place, that button that his precum weeping cock just needed to push to make her come, it just had to exist. ‘Find it! Reach it!’ she thought.

She was fucking him ferociously. The elegant prostitute acting fully in service of her client was long gone. What remained was an animal in ever rising heat. She was loud. Her high pitched moaning drowned out his deep grunts. She could see it in his eyes, in the sweat on his face, feel it in the increasing strength of his powerful grip of his hands on her body. He would come soon, and she wouldn’t.

“God, Lizzy, this is…”

She was sure that he had no idea how to end his sentence. This was the point when she normally gave up, when she prioritized her client's needs over her own again, to satisfy him like the good whore she was. She contemplated the idea, to just give up, to send him over the edge, to moan in unison with his orgasm, to give him the illusion of having satisfied her. She had done it countless times before. But then she did something new. She stopped moving. His cock was still nestled in the wet embrace of her demanding cunt. She looked him in the eye.

“Lizzy… you oka…?”

He couldn’t finish his question because she had closed his mouth with hers. It was a passionate but short kiss. She would come today, she decided. She deserved that. She ended that kiss, but her face stayed close to his. Sometimes when the frustration grew to large, she allowed herself to relive that memory of her first rape. But only when she was alone, never with a client - or any man for that matter. The experience was too intense, too emotionally draining. The thought of actually getting fucked, of feeling a cock inside and a man on top of her while thinking of that night, scared her. Nevertheless, she’d risk it with Richard, the gentle giant.

“Make me come, Richard.”

She whispered onto his lips. She saw in his eyes that he would do everything in his power to follow her command. She closed her eyes, preparing herself for what was to come. She accepted the memory into her conscious mind.

“Of course.”

Like a man possessed did Richard spin her around. He almost threw her light body onto the bed and within seconds he was on top of her. Up to this point, she had been in control, because he let her. The ease with which he had put her on his back made it all too clear how great the difference in strength was between the two. His touch was rough, but not violent. When he reentered her body, his thrust was powerful, but not without regard for her needs.

“Of course.”

The two men holding her arms followed their leader’s command. They threw her light body onto the bed, holding her in place, and with all the time in the world did he crawl slowly on top of her. The difference in power between her and these three men was so great that it was very clear who was in control. She didn’t mind rough sex, but this was nothing but violence. When he first penetrated her, he couldn’t have cared less for whether she was ready. She screamed.


“Please!”
“Please!”
“Fuck me harder!
“Stop!”

Richard tried to grant her every wish. Their dynamic had completely changed. He was now serving her needs. She clung onto him, spread her thighs for him, wrapped her legs around him to pull him deeper into her. Every thrust into her lap squeezed the wet arousal out of her body and stained the bed sheets with her lust. Her screams of lust were so loud that she knew that the walls were no longer able to contain her voice, arousing the clients in the neighboring rooms with this shameless vocal display of unbound pleasure. Richard had been close before, but now he prolonged his orgasm for as long as he could to give his mistress whatever she desired. Now that she was actually close to coming herself, she didn’t want it to be over.

The man who was raping her, who was breaking her in to make her more compliant for her future clients, didn’t care about her well being at all. She was to be his slave, a tool to make money. She tried her best to escape his assault, she desperately wanted to close her legs, moved her hips in the hope to dislodge his brutal cock, but to no avail. She had never been brutally fucked while being completely dry. Every thrust into her lap squeezed the blood pouring from her abused cunt out of her body and stained the bed sheets with her agony. Her screams of pain were ear piercing and echoed loudly in the wide open room that contained many new arrivals like her, but her own ears seemed to be the only ones receptive to her plea. The man was close now. She dreaded the moment of his climax, but at least it would be over.

“Come inside me…”
“I’ll come inside you.”
“I’ll fill you up nicely.”
“No!”

Richard followed suit. He increased the intensity of his thrusts as he was nearing his climax. The overwhelming mix of pleasure and fear made her cry. Tears were streaming down her face. One moment, she was moaning ecstatically into Richard’s ears, the next she begged him to stop with pained whimpers. He groaned deeply on the advent of his orgasm while she shrieked hysterically fearing for her life. The pain inflicted by his assault radiated throughout her entire body while the wave of numbing pleasure she so desperately sought was just about to wash over her. And then...

He came.
He came.

She could feel him bulge inside of her. He had restrained himself for as long as he could and now he flooded her with his cum as she had desired. She could feel it all, the pressure that his cock exerted as it expanded one last time inside of her, the heat of his seed he was pouring into her, his hot breath on her neck, the strength of his hands on her shoulders. And it made her come too. Her mouth stood wide open, catching the still streaming tears carrying the remnants of her once impervious makeup. The shiver of pleasure that had rocked her body for a while now turned into full on tremors and the staccato of moans and whimpers became one long wail of ecstasy. Richard had not fully emptied himself inside of her when he gave her a passionate kiss to commemorate the end of this union.

But what she remembered was not a kiss. The man who was raping her mercilessly came with ferocity. His orgasm painted her battered cunt in red and white, forever changing how’d she view her body even long after his cum and her blood had been washed off. She dreaded the consequences of him coming inside of her, but at least it was over. But when she saw how her rapist simply switched places with one of the other two men and the third started to push his erect cock into her mouth, her mind broke. The last thing she remembered of that night was one of her own thoughts.

“I will die here.”
.
.
.

.
.
.

“Lizzy…? Lizzy?!”

When she came to, Richard had withdrawn himself from her body but was still lying on top of her, looking at her with worry on his face. Her body was still quivering from the aftershock of her orgasm, her mouth stood wide open with her saliva drooling out of it, her tears had completely ruined her makeup and she was still crying. She needed a moment to compose herself. Richard’s worry was somewhat mitigated when she appeared to be responsive again. He lifted his body of hers to give her some space. She sat on the edge of the bed. For some reason, she felt the need to cover herself with a blanket. Richard handed her a tissue.

“Are you fi..?”

“I’m sorry, Richard. This wasn’t very professional of me.”

She interrupted him and gave him a warm smile, putting on that mask again.

“But now you know something about me that only few of my clients know. I cry when I experience intense orgasms. Stupid, huh? But at least you can be sure now that I wasn’t faking it.”

She tried to put the veneer of professionalism back on with humor.

“Sure…”

The look on his face said it all. He didn’t believe a word of it. But he knew that it wasn’t his place to dig deeper if she didn’t say anything herself. Instead he got slowly dressed. Lizzy tried to act as she always did when she said goodbye to Richard, but he seemed more distant than usual. She couldn’t fault him for that. She wondered whether she would see him again. Losing him as a client would be sad. He was one of the good ones who genuinely seemed to care.

After Richard left, Lizzy went to the bathroom to clean herself up. She had one more client after all. But her mind wasn’t fully there. She had taken a quick shower and now she was about to reapply her makeup, mostly to hide the tiredness clearly visible on her face. But before she could do so, she stopped.

“What happened there…?”

She asked her mirror image. Of course she didn’t receive an answer. Lizzy had spent a year in forced prostitution after that fateful night she thought she was going to die. After escaping that hell, she tried to live a normal life, but after another year she returned to a life as a prostitute, this time of her own volition. She had alienated many people around her with that decision. It was hard for them to understand, maybe because she didn’t fully understand it herself. She had been forced, yes, but she had also been good at it. Why should she give these men even more power over her life decisions now that they were in prison and she was free? But was it really that simple, that she was just doing what she was good at? She didn’t have an answer for it. Today was about something much simpler than that. It was Valentine’s Day and she simply didn’t want to be alone, she wanted to enjoy passionate sex and come. Lizzy sighed, fogging up the mirror with her breath. She could think about this later.

“One more client…”

She murmured to herself, then she started working on her makeup.

Lizzy was just about to leave the bathroom when she heard a voice.

“Hello…?”

She opened the bathroom door and saw a young man in front of her.

“Hi, I’m Lizzy.”

Her tone was friendly and she casually went to greet him.

“Yeah, uhm,… I’m David.”

She knew what this was. A young man, 21 or 22 maybe, here for the first time, feeling insecure. His posture and nervous glances made him an open book. He had decided to visit a prostitute, but now he was getting cold feet. If she had to take a guess, David had either recently broken up with a girlfriend or was pining after some woman who didn’t reciprocate his feelings. And on Valentine’s Day, the loneliness had just become too much to bear and so he ended up here, with her. Lizzy knew how to adjust her demeanor for this kind of case.

“Don’t worry, David. We got time. If you need a few moments and just want to talk for a bit first, then that would be nice for me to.”

She gave him a warm smile. David let down his guard a little, but he was far from looking like a man who felt comfortable in his shoes. He scratched his head, trying to look at her while he spoke.

“You are very kind, uhm… It’s just… It’s Valentine’s Day… There was this discount... and coming here felt like the right thing to do, but… But now that I am standing here, I’m not entirely sure what I am even doing here.”

He gave her an embarrassed smile before averting his eyes again. Lizzy thought that he was sweet in his insecurity. She walked towards him, put her left hand on his cheek and gently nudged him to look her in the eye. With her head slightly tilted to the side, she said:

“It’s okay, I feel a little lonely, too.”
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This story is a special one for me. I was in the middle of writing it - I had probably finished the first 1,000 words or so - when @Vela Nanashi informed me that the Ravishment University forum was no longer available. We had both put in a lot of time and effort trying to restructure it, when the forum was suddenly taken down. Since then, I hadn't written another word. Being able to finish the story now feels good. The overall outline of the story stayed the same, but I do wonder what it would have looked like had I finished it two months earlier.

Given the very strong competition in the current set of stories for the contest, I hope this story doesn't fall too far behind the others and was worth reading nevertheless. :)

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Shocker
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Re: It's okay, I feel a little lonely, too. - RavishU Memorial Contest

Post by Shocker »

An interesting story, with a jarring jump from a professional relationship into her terrifying past. I think I can see what you were trying with the blending of the two colors, but it made the reading more difficult.

Welcome to the contest, and good luck.
My collected stories can be found here Shocking, positively shocking
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Re: It's okay, I feel a little lonely, too. - RavishU Memorial Contest

Post by Claire »

Shocker wrote: Tue Apr 08, 2025 12:12 am An interesting story, with a jarring jump from a professional relationship into her terrifying past. I think I can see what you were trying with the blending of the two colors, but it made the reading more difficult.

Welcome to the contest, and good luck.
I'm glad you liked it. Regarding the color, we could try to do something about that. The second color is not set in stone.

To me, the issue of readability was confined to that one sentence. Originally, I wanted to use this color:

1) "He increased the intensity of his thrusts as he was nearing his climax. The overwhelming mix of pleasure and fear made her cry. Tears were streaming down her face. "

But I decided on the brighter red I'm using now in the text.

2) He increased the intensity of his thrusts as he was nearing his climax. The overwhelming mix of pleasure and fear made her cry. Tears were streaming down her face.

To me, that was a clear improvement. I thought that with this color, this part was decently readable and everything else where entire paragraphs or sentences used the same color were easily readable. Let's try this maybe.

3) He increased the intensity of his thrusts as he was nearing his climax. The overwhelming mix of pleasure and fear made her cry. Tears were streaming down her face.

Or shall we dare a little more @Vela Nanashi?

4) He increased the intensity of his thrusts as he was nearing his climax. The overwhelming mix of pleasure and fear made her cry. Tears were streaming down her face.


So I rejected version 1. I am currently using version 2. I think version 3 is a bit eaier to read. Version 4 does not seem to be an improvement to me in terms of readability. What do you think?
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Re: It's okay, I feel a little lonely, too. - RavishU Memorial Contest

Post by Vela Nanashi »

2 and 3 are okay to read, still not great, but anyone who can't read that could maybe handle the single colour that you get if you highlight the text.
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Re: It's okay, I feel a little lonely, too. - RavishU Memorial Contest

Post by LaLia »

Each of your stories is worth reading, and the tough competition applies to us as well. As always, it's written in detail, with a strong focus on the characters and their personalities. For my taste, though, it's quite vanilla style. It's interesting that we all took very different paths in this contest. Vela chose sci-fi, I chose fantasy/horror, and you chose the present and something realistic. I have to read Schocker's story tomorrow, but I expect it will be just as good. It would be great if more people participated in the future.
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Re: It's okay, I feel a little lonely, too. - RavishU Memorial Contest

Post by Vela Nanashi »

Teaser, sounds like a fun client to have, also yeah if you already paid for a sex worker's services there is no need to treat them bad, unless that specifically is something you paid for, and she is providing.

Third person perspective is not best for me, but I am sure it will still be good, also it takes reading a bit into the dialog to figure out who is speaking, I may just be a little bit derpy today though :)

I like their chemistry :)

Teaser reprise.

Some cute humour too I like it (with she paying him) :)

It is hard for most men to resist giving beautiful women what they want, but that is also true for all beautiful people, they tend to get things for free/easier in life, but it also can have costs for them.

Yeah I imagine it can be hard to not worry if you are a relatively good/nice man. I have read a book written by a whore (she wants to reclaim the term as a positive thing to her her job is about taking care of her clients, show them love, but yeah that is another book).

Ok Lizzy that is a bit unfair, it is not wrong for him to care about you too, that could feel good as well.

Nice of him to take a shower first, like I think clients should, but not all think of it.

For a taller woman it must be nice to find a large man to match, as it always feels better in a primal way when the man you are with seems like he could protect you.

Closing his eyes to make his other senses more intense is a nice touch :) Also satisfying to make a man/woman make pleasure sounds, in whatever way they express themselves, as it is music to anyone's mind who cares about more than themselves, but their lover, be it a paid for one or not.

Good to see her desire him, though I am not sure what you mean about her body lying to her, I mean I know that both men and women can get ready for sex, if in danger, like even if not into the idea of rape, seeing it can make some get wet, I think it is a survival thing, to avoid taking damage, so maybe her body is lying to her that way?

Having your lover want it is hot to me, eagerness and all that :)

For five years (was year), not being able to come for that long must be really rough, if not being able to make that happen at all it is usually for psychological reasons, though for inexperienced people it could also be they don't know how to do it, but that is not the case here. Also she can only come when remembering some mysterious it?

Cock's jumping and dancing with excited joy is wonderful :)

Ah ok a first rape and forced prostitution, not sure if I read it wrong earlier, is she still in forced prostitution or doing it voluntarily these days? (though even if voluntarily it can often be that those who go into prostitution are people who were hurt and damaged in life like she sounds like she is.)

Precum brings with it some nice happy/anti depressant chemicals and hormones that also boost sexual desire slightly, not as much as cum but still some, hopefully his weeping cock will let her get there. Her riding him, controlling the pace, based on her own needs also should help her cum. He seems like the kind of guy that can enjoy a woman taking the lead in sex, some men though have to be the one fucking the woman not the other way around, I enjoy a bit of both though, both giving and taking from both sides.

She had closed his mouth over hers, I think that would read better if it read: She had closed her mouth over his. As she was doing the action :)

She had been in control because he let her, yeah... It is both scary and hot how powerfully and easily a man can just move a woman where he wants her, it is hot when you want it, to feel both the power yet also gentleness still, of a strong man.

Though I think maybe this is a bit unfair to him, on some level, at least if he finds out, but he might still try to help her as much as he can, but also feel bad about her reliving her rape while he was making love to her.

Her rapist was a weak man though, needing his two minions to help him?

Adding her song of pleasure to the ambiance of the whorehouse is not a bad thing for any of the clients I am sure :)

I don't think Richard or any man who prolongs their own pleasure to make their lover cum is doing so entirely selflessly, as I would imagine it feels good to make your lover cum for you, for real, and I also think prolonging/delaying orgasm tends to make it more intense when you finally let it happen.

Yeah that is a rough memory, and having to relive that every time she wants to come is horrifying torture. Yet clearly still worth it for her on some level. I just hope Richard can help her feel better and let her release her emotions safely, one can have such an amazing emotional cry release after a good orgasm, especially if with a good lover one feels safe with.

She shutting him out like that probably hurt him yeah...

Ok good so she is doing prostitution these days of her own volition, at least on some level.

Trying to help the young man at the end is sweet, and he was kinda cute too.

- - -

I liked the story, it can be hard to restart a story that sort of got interrupted, so I am very glad you managed to do that. I can only say I hope that Richard and Lizzy can maybe go out to dinner sometime and she can be honest with him, but that is just me injecting my saccharine hope and joy probably where it does not belong :)

- - -

The current choice of colours was readable for me, but I agree that the switching slowed my reading speed down a lot, the contrast of red text on black for my eyes is less than white text on black, and switching fast is even harder due to eyes having to read a less bright letter next to bright ones, but still readable for me.

- - -

Keep writing amazing stories Claire :) You are a good writer :)

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Re: It's okay, I feel a little lonely, too. - RavishU Memorial Contest

Post by Claire »

LaLia wrote: Tue Apr 08, 2025 11:56 pm Each of your stories is worth reading, and the tough competition applies to us as well. As always, it's written in detail, with a strong focus on the characters and their personalities. For my taste, though, it's quite vanilla style. It's interesting that we all took very different paths in this contest. Vela chose sci-fi, I chose fantasy/horror, and you chose the present and something realistic. I have to read Schocker's story tomorrow, but I expect it will be just as good. It would be great if more people participated in the future.
I appreciate the kind words. :) Regarding the competition, I have not given up hope yet that @LtBroccoli might join us.

I find it interesting that you view the story as vanilla. I assume you base that on the sexual practices depicted? I will probably never be a writer who goes into a large variety of positions, toys or sexual practices in the depiction of a rape scene, especially not in a short story. I am more interested in playing with how a scene is structured, what idea it explores, how to phrase certain descriptions. That is why I prefer to write a short story like this where present time and memory are told in parallel, mirror each other and ultimately bleed into one another. In my perception, that makes a story much more not-vanilla than any variety in the sex scenes itself ever could. It's fun for me to see that different perspective. The thought that someone might read this story and consider it vanilla never occurred to me. I really like getting feedback like this.


@Vela Nanashi I love your live commentary style feedback, it's fun. I found it particularly helpful for this story. I like to read your confusion about Lizzy's history and her inability to orgasm. That was exactly what I intended when I decided to drop feed that information to the reader rather than revealing all of it in one big exposition dump. It's nice to see something working like this. :) I noticed that you went into much less detail after the orgasm moment. Did that part just interest you less or where you running out of steam for your commentary? :)
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Vela Nanashi
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Re: It's okay, I feel a little lonely, too. - RavishU Memorial Contest

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I think I was swept up in the moment there and only wrote the aftermath :)
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Re: It's okay, I feel a little lonely, too. - RavishU Memorial Contest

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Hmm, translated one-to-one, does vanilla mean "standard" or "soft"? Standard sounds too negative. But you understood correctly that I was referring to the sexual aspect, and that's totally fine. I prefer an exciting story that doesn't shine with harsh practices, rather than one that's poorly written but extreme. I just wanted to say that this gives you a certain brand of your own, and that's definitely a positive thing.
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Re: It's okay, I feel a little lonely, too. - RavishU Memorial Contest

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LaLia wrote: Thu Apr 10, 2025 9:36 pm Hmm, translated one-to-one, does vanilla mean "standard" or "soft"? Standard sounds too negative. But you understood correctly that I was referring to the sexual aspect, and that's totally fine. I prefer an exciting story that doesn't shine with harsh practices, rather than one that's poorly written but extreme. I just wanted to say that this gives you a certain brand of your own, and that's definitely a positive thing.
In a general context, I would treat vanilla as synonymous with "standard" or "default option" and I think it carries with it the connotation of "save", "not daring" and, more negative maybe, of "boring" and "bland"? Don't worry, that is not how I took your comment.
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